Chief Crisp Consumption Officer

Guardian of the snack cupboard and firm believer that every flavour is the best flavour. If a packet of crisps goes missing, the investigation usually starts (and ends) here. His life's mission is to ensure no crisp is ever left behind.

Official Spider Catcher, Family Taxi Driver, Transformer Curator & Light Switch Turner-Offer

Dad Chris is the dependable heart of Johnson Manor. If there's a spider to relocate, a shelf to fix, someone who needs a lift, or a mysterious noise that "needs Dad to have a look," he's already on the case.

By day, he's the Manor's official taxi service, emergency repair department, and the person everyone calls when something needs sorting.

By night... he's usually admiring his ever-growing collection of Transformers. Whether they're Autobots or Decepticons, every new addition is treated like a treasured museum piece (although we're fairly certain he'd still transform them if nobody was watching).

His other great passions include cheeseburgers—preferably in quantities that doctors would describe as "ambitious"—and Black Forest gâteau, which has an average life expectancy of approximately five minutes once Chris discovers it's in the fridge.

Despite all this, he's wonderfully patient, endlessly reliable, and always there when his family needs him. Johnson Manor simply wouldn't run without him... although the fridge might stay stocked for a little longer.

Senior Architect of Technical Things

Johnson Manor's resident engineering genius. An introverted, self-taught creator who quietly builds impressive technical marvels while everyone else wonders how he did it.

Sightings are rare, but when supplies of chocolate run low, Fearless can occasionally be observed emerging from his workshop to assist the family's ongoing Chocolate Hoarding Operation.

Chaos Coordinator & Head of Comedy

Brings laughter wherever she goes and firmly believes that every day is improved with at least one joke. A whirlwind of energy whose plans usually begin with, "I've got an idea..."

Head of Security & Chief Welcome Officer

Dave takes his responsibilities very seriously.

His primary duties include monitoring suspicious noises, inspecting every visitor who enters the Manor, supervising family activities, and ensuring that nobody eats anything without him being informed.

He is also highly skilled in the ancient art of looking completely innocent while absolutely knowing what he's done.

Dave is convinced that every member of the family exists primarily to provide him with attention, snacks, and walks.

Director of Household Operations

Gizmo has perfected the art of supervising everyone else while contributing absolutely nothing to the actual work.

From carefully selected sleeping positions to strategically timed appearances when food is involved, Gizmo has mastered the lifestyle of a cat who knows they're in charge.

The humans may believe they own the house.

Gizmo knows better.

Chief Communications Officer

Kermit the cockatiel is Johnson Manor's resident broadcaster.

No announcement is too important, no conversation too private, and no moment too quiet to warrant a contribution from Kermit.

Whether he's singing, chirping, shouting or simply making sure everyone knows he's still there, Kermit ensures that silence is never allowed to become a permanent feature of the Manor.